Antique writing paper
Sunday, November 3, 2019
The phone with the verision Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words
The phone with the verision - Essay Example Consider an iPhone purchase either through a two year contract and Verizon Edge. Purchasing through the agreement will cost an individual an upfront payment of $2325.90 while Verizon will take a 20 months installment of $110.65 giving the full payment for the device as $2213.78. The two-year agreement will however take an entire period of 24 months that is higher than that of the edge program making the agreementââ¬â¢s total monthly cost to be lower as compared to that of Verizon. Buying S5 using an agreement will cost an individual $2371 which is higher than $2159 charged for the Verizon Edge. The monthly charges however reverse with that of Verizon being higher since the deal takes a longer period of 24 months as compared to that of Verizon, which takes 20 months. It is, therefore, evident that in the long run a Verizon Edge program saves much money as compared to a typical agreement and also makes upgrading easy. It is, therefore, recommended for individuals to register for this program and take advantage of this new
Friday, November 1, 2019
Has the internet shifted power to consumers Discuss Essay
Has the internet shifted power to consumers Discuss - Essay Example Many technological products such as laptops and cell phones can be bought online. Other types of products are furniture shopping that allows consumers to conveniently make their purchases online without the hassle of actually going to the outlet and placing the orders. Online shopping is a highly easy and convenient option for consumers. Also some organisations have the facility of money back guarantee if any customer is not satisfied with the actual product and service that has been received by the consumer once the order was placed online. Also online shopping allows the consumers to choose their preference and customize the product options according to likeness. Dell computers for example allow consumers to customise their laptop details and accordingly the products for the consumers are formed. 2. Knowledge about Market With the advent of internet, consumers now have a lot of awareness and knowledge about the different varieties and ranges of any certain product. The quality, com position and all other details of the product can be known. The companies that are providing a typical type of product can be known through the internet. This increases the options from which the customers have to make a choice. Market knowledge is known by the consumers and the decisions of the consumers are based upon the knowledge of the market. Before as there was no internet, consumers had to travel physically and then gain the knowledge about the market and that too only few markets could be studies but now having the complete knowledge about the market is not at all a difficult process. As we know that knowledge is power, and consumers are empowered highly with the knowledge that they receive through the browsing of the internet. 3. Marketing Intelligence Organisations usually develop strong marketing intelligence tools for catering their customers. This aspect again has empowered consumers strongly via the internet. Consumers, if they get attracted towards an advertisement o nline may click it and then develop interests for buying the product or not. This shows that organisations need to compete in their marketing intelligence areas so that they can target the consumers and attract them towards their products and services. Consumers usually base their decisions on advertisements that catch their attention and prove its worth in a single glance rather than probing deep down in their details. The more attractive tools used by the organisations; the more they can impact the decision making of the consumers. Internet allows consumers to view all online advertisements clearly with all the details and product features. 4. Comparison of prices Internet as we all know is an open portal for all the businesses and all the consumers to conduct their business transactions or other personal transactions. Internet has increased the competition amongst the organisations as consumers are empowered with the ability of conducting price comparisons of the different produc t ranges while they make their purchasing decisions. Gas prices can be compared by consumers online and they may make decisions of where to buy the gas. Prices of products and services can be compared with the international market as well. If consumers feel that international markets are providing better offers then through the online portals they can order things from the international
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
Auditing Case Study Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 3750 words
Auditing - Case Study Example The authorization of gambling is not an issue for a number of states in the US but the major issue is in the form of developing quality audit programs to measure and analyze the operations of the casinos in a systematic manner (Arens, 2012). A number of states in the US have stated the fact that gambling and especially casinos promote economic development. Nevadaââ¬â¢s statute declares that gaming industry is vital for the state development and general welfare of people while New Jerseyââ¬â¢s statute states that casinos promotes tourism, resort, and recreational activities leading to the creation of economic value in the long run. There is no doubt that several states in the US have promoted casinos in a legal manner but the obvious question surrounding the operations of casinos is in the form of use of auditing tools in order to assess and analyze the overall success factors associated with it. In order to do so, the major purpose of the discussion is to analyze the usefulness of auditing in the context of analyzing the case study of Sands Hotel and Casino. This will help in understanding the relevance and importance of auditing in making business operations fair and transparent. Auditing refers to a systematic review and examination of books, accounts, journals, documents, and vouchers of organizations to analyze and assess the validity and reliability of financial statements in terms of absolute trueness and fairness. Additionally, auditing is considered as an independent examination of data, statements, records, and performance of organizations. Auditing is a complex process requiring high degree of honesty and understanding of the financial statements. An auditor is required to analyze and assess the evidences along with evaluating the same on the basis of the skilled judgment. Additionally, an auditor needs to offer clear and true verdict of his findings through a systematic report
Monday, October 28, 2019
Diffusion and osmosis lab Essay Example for Free
Diffusion and osmosis lab Essay What happened to the iodine, the starch, the glucose and the water in your experiment? Explain which molecules did/did not cross the membrane and in which direction they moved. Substance Prediction Results Starch Starch will stay in the cellulose tubing The results were correct Glucose Glucose will defuse and move out The results were correct Iodine The iodine will change color The results were correct 2. Did the results of your experiment agree or disagree with your prediction? Why or why not? My results agreed with my prediction because the starch, glucose and iodine stayed in the cellulose tubing, or the water changed color. 3. Considering your observations, suggest an explanation for the results of your experiment. What assumptions did you make about the nature of the membrane? The cell contains what enters. Small molecules can quickly go through and out of the cell. Meaning the small molecule diffuse through the process of osmosis. Lab 2 ââ¬â ELODEA Objective: To demonstrate and explain effects of osmosis across a living membrane. 1. What changes took place in the Elodea cell after salt water is added? Did these changes agree or disagree with your prediction? Why or why or not? When the salt was added to the water it caused the water concentration to lessen but the solute to increase. There are more water molecules going out of the cell than in the cell the cell membrane began to shrink known as dehydration. 2. Explain, in detail, the process that caused these changes to occur. The elodea would not be able to live in salt-water environment because there is a greater concentration of the water in the cell. When there is salt in the cell, it would die. 3. Is this process reversible? If so, describe how you would reverse it? Yes, I think this process is reversible. You would have more of a salt solution then a water solution. Then you would add the water to the concentration then it will be revered
Saturday, October 26, 2019
Is the Cause of Terrorism Islam, or Foreign Policy? :: September 11 Terrorism Essays
Was the Cause of September 11 Islam or Foreign Policy? George W. Bush has taken a stand on the true nature of Islam, calling it, for instance, a "religion of peace." As strange as this is to hear from the president of the United States, Bush's declarations have given rise to a good deal of useful public discussion about Islam. Unfortunately, this discussion has too often accepted the confused terms of the president's rhetoric: Is there, or is there not, something wrong in the nature of Islam? Salman Rushdie ("Yes, This is About Islam," New York Times 11/2/01) and Jonathan Ebel ("Territory is Not Mind," Sightings 11/15/01) both make some useful points in the process of taking up the question, but somehow leave standing the president's fundamental misconception that a religion has an essence. Surely it is not fair to say that September 11 is "about" Islam. Violent hatred and intolerance can be adduced in too many corners of the religious world to imagine that it comes, simply, from the doctrines of one holy book or another. At the same time, it is difficult for me to blame Salman Rushdie, especially, for perceiving something within Islam today that is prone to violence. His non-violent, literary attack on Islam was, after all, taken by some Muslims to justify very real threats to his life. And, he marshals some reasonable evidence that many Muslims do believe that Islam is on board with the September 11 terrorists. Still, we ought not to declare that September 11 is "about" Islam, especially if this means that we ignore "foreign policy, humanity, global society, and the just ordering thereof"-- which Ebel says are obviously what September 11 is also "about." Ebel's list implies that a larger, broader causal story needs to be told, rather than simply to say that Islam gave us the horrors of September 11. I agree wholeheartedly. Believing too simplistic a causal story carries both moral and practical flaws. If Islam itself -- or something in its nature -- was the cause of the attacks, we could only prevent further attacks by preventing further Islam. In this way, such a simplistic belief would tend to sanction persecution if not genocide against Muslims. From a practical standpoint, we will have to understand the details of the real, long-term causal story if we wish to minimize the threat of repeated terrorism in America.
Thursday, October 24, 2019
Web Based Information System
Implications for project management and development processes The unique nature of many web-based applications broadens the role of traditional project management and adds a new dimension to the software development process. In addition to the participation and contribution of analysts, designers, programmers, architects, managers, domain experts and so on, web-based applications often contain significant multimedia content (images, movie clips, sound clips and text) requiring specialist resources for their development. Multimedia development Groups separate from the software engineers usually produce multimedia web content in parallel, in a similar way that on-line help is typically produced by a technical writer rather than a software developer. Some recent studies indicate that specialist resources needed to develop multimedia content may outnumber software engineers. For the purposes of estimating software development effort, multimedia content is assumed to exist and the effort required for their production is outside the scope of the software engineering process. However, the effort of integrating these elements needs to taken into account. Furthermore the effort to create the multimedia content itself must be incorporated to produce an overall project estimate. focus on developing business logic The novelty of developing web-based applications can be captivating and may obscure the fact that modelling an applicationââ¬â¢s business logic, whether it is being implemented in a web page, a component or an object remains the central focus of the project. Web-based application development requires project management best practice as much as any other type of application development. Business networking Business networking is a marketing method by which business opportunities are created through networks of like-minded business people. There are several prominent business networking organizations that create models of networking activity that, when followed, allow the business person to build new business relationship and generate business opportunities at the same time. Many business people contend business networking is a more cost-effective method of generating new business than advertising or public relations efforts. This is because business networking is a low-cost activity that involves more personal commitment than company money. As an example, a business network may agree to meet weekly or monthly with the purpose of exchanging business leads and referrals with fellow members. To complement this activity, members often meet outside this circle, on their own time, and build their own ââ¬Å"one-to-oneâ⬠relationship with the fellow member. Business networking can be conducted in a local business community, or on a more larger scale via the Internet. Business networking websites have grown over recent years due to the Internet's ability to connect people from all over the world. Business networking can have a meaning also in the ICT domain, i. e. the provision of operating support to companies / organizations, and related value chains / value networks. It refers to an activity coordination with a wider scope and a simpler implementation than pre-organized workflows or web-based impromptu searches for transaction counterparts (workflow is useful to coordinate activities, but it is complicated by the use of s. . ââ¬Å"patternsâ⬠to deviate the flow of work from a pure sequence, in order to compensate its intrinsic ââ¬Å"linearityâ⬠; impromptu searches for transaction counterparts on the web are useful as well, but only for non strategic supplies; both are complicated by a plethora of interfaces ââ¬â SOA / XML / web services ââ¬â needed among different organizations and even between different IT applications with in the same organization). Online business networking Businesses are increasingly using business social networks like XING or professional business networking tools like Boardex as a means of growing their circle of business contacts and promoting themselves online. Since businesses are expanding globally, social networks make it easier to keep in touch with other contacts around the world. Specific cross-border e-commerce platforms and business partnering networks now make globalization accessible also for small and medium sized companies. Face-to-face business networking Professionals who wish to leverage their presentation skills with the urgency of physically being present, attend general and exclusive events. Many professionals tend to prefer face-to-face networking over online based networking because the potential for higher quality relationships are possible. Many individuals also prefer face-to-face because people tend to prefer actually knowing and meeting who they intend to do business with. General business networking Before online networking, there was and has always been, networking face-to-face. ââ¬Å"Schmoozingâ⬠or ââ¬Å"rubbing elbowsâ⬠are expressions used among business professionals for introducing and meeting one another, and establishing rapport. Business networking in the ICT domain Companies / organizations ââ¬â and related value chains / value networks ââ¬â need some sort of IT support. Traditionally, it is provided by software applications, software packages /suites, ERPs and/or workflows; presently, also by different types of web-based innovations. A truly ââ¬Å"ICTâ⬠business networking approach rethinks ââ¬â and rebuilds ââ¬â the operating support from scratch, around two key business features: information contributions, to be provided by the activities involved (whether they are performed by human beings, automated tools or jointly by the two, in a coordinated way); (automated) information exchanges, to be provided by the TLC network. Information contributions and exchanges, in turn, need to be supported by data storage (plain or redundant, with or without automated recovery to grant service continuity) and access security (signature, encryption, authentication, decryption), which both can be provided either as add-on's or as built-in features. Introduction to Novell Novell, Inc. has made news over the years for its business struggles. Novell enjoyed success as a popular vendor of network software ââ¬â principally the NetWareà ® operating system. Today the company is working to build an Internet networking business, but they face strong competition. NetWare The NetWare operating system supports the networking of personal computers (PCs). Installed on a PC, NetWare creates a server environment for the sharing of files, printers, and other network ââ¬Å"services. â⬠One of the first software products designed for PC networking, early versions of NetWare appeared in the late 1980s. NetWare 3 was originally called ââ¬Å"NetWare 386â⬠and released for use with Intel's 80386 processor. Likewise, Novell developed NetWare 4 in the early 1990s for the Intel 80486. NetWare 5, the latest version of Novell's operating system, has been available since September, 1998. Together, NetWare 3, 4, and 5 enjoy an installed base of millions of servers worldwide. NetWare encountered stiff competition from Microsoft beginning in the mid-1990s with the introduction of Windows NT Server products. Some believe the rapid growth of Linux server networking ââ¬â although difficult to measure accurately due to the open nature of that operating system ââ¬â is also impacting NetWare's popularity. NDS The media sometimes refers to Novell Directory Services (NDSà ®) as the ââ¬Å"crown jewelâ⬠of Novell's product offerings. Like NetWare, NDS has benefited from a long development history resulting in mature technology with a large installed customer base. What makes NDS especially appealing is its flexibility and the range of potential applications in network management and ecommerce. NDS is an LDAP directory service. Directory services like NDS provide information repositories for distributed network resources ranging from devices to Web site customer profiles. LDAP ââ¬â the Lightweight Directory Access Protocol ââ¬â offers a standard way to access this information. Web sites such as CNN and AltaVista use the NDS eDirectoryâ⠢ product. eDirectory tracks visitor activity to these sites, building a special-purpose ââ¬Å"databaseâ⬠of customers that can be used to provide personalization services. While NDS was originally a NetWare-only technology, eDirectory now works with Windows NT and 2000, Solaris, and Linux in addition to NetWare 5 servers. Novell offers several other products based on eDirectory technology. NDS Corporate Edition, for example, implements network resource management. The digitalmeâ⠢ service adds more secure personalization capabilities to eDirectory. As with NetWare, however, Novell faces competition in the directory services space from Microsoft Active Directory (not to mention products from other vendors such as iPlanet Directory Server). More Web Services In 1996 and 1997, Novell achieved some success with its IntranetWare product family design for intranet data sharing. Today, Novell continues to offer GroupWise email and calendaring for intranets (and other Web-based networks). Novell also is working with technology for Web content caching. The Novell Content Exchange subscription service brings Internet caching and other software to the data center where Web content is served. Conclusion Novell's low stock price has led to speculation of a possible buyout in the company's near future. These rumors are nothing new. As far back as 1996 and 1997, industry pundits debated various buyout or merger scenarios involving IBM, AT&T, Netscape, and even Microsoft. None of these scenarios came to pass, so perhaps it most likely ââ¬â layoffs aside ââ¬â that Novell will continue working to grow its network services business in the months and years ahead.
Wednesday, October 23, 2019
Fool Chapter 21
TWENTY-ONE AT THE WHITE CLIFFS YEARS AGO ââ¬â ââ¬Å"Pocket,â⬠said Cordelia, ââ¬Å"have you ever heard of this warrior queen named Boudicca?â⬠Cordelia was about fifteen at the time, and she had sent for me because she wished to discuss politics. She lay on her bed with a large leather volume open before her. ââ¬Å"No, lamb, who was she queen of?â⬠ââ¬Å"Why, of the pagan Britons. Of us.â⬠Lear had recently shifted back to the pagan beliefs, thus opening a whole new world of learning for Cordelia. ââ¬Å"Ah, that explains it. Educated in a nunnery, love, I've a very shallow knowledge of pagan ways, although I have to say, their festivals are smashing. Rampant drunken shagging while wearing flower wreaths seems far superior to midnight mass and self-flagellation, but then, I'm a fool.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, it says here that she kicked nine colors of shit out of the Roman legions when they invaded.â⬠ââ¬Å"Really, that's what it says, nine colors of shit?â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm paraphrasing. Why do you think we've no warrior queens anymore?â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, lamb, war requires swift and resolute action.â⬠ââ¬Å"And you're saying that a woman can't move with swift resolve?â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm saying no such thing. She may move with swiftness and resolve, but only after choosing the correct outfit and shoes, and therein lies the undoing of any potential warrior queen, I suspect.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh bollocks!â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll wager your Boudicca lived before they invented clothing. Easy days then for a warrior queen. Just hitch up your tits and start taking heads, it was. Now, well, I daresay erosion would take down a country before most women could pick out their invading kit.â⬠ââ¬Å"Most women. But not me?â⬠ââ¬Å"Of course not you, lamb. Them. I meant only weak-willed tarts like your sisters.â⬠ââ¬Å"Pocket, I think I shall be a warrior queen.â⬠ââ¬Å"Of what, the royal petting zoo at Boffingshire?â⬠ââ¬Å"You'll see, Pocket. The whole of the sky will darken with the smoke from my army's fires, the ground will tremble under their horses' hooves, and kings will kneel outside their city walls, crowns in hand, begging to surrender rather than feel the wrath of Queen Cordelia fall upon their people. But I shall be merciful.â⬠ââ¬Å"Goes without saying, doesn't it?â⬠ââ¬Å"And you, fool, will no longer be able to behave like the right shit that you are.â⬠ââ¬Å"Fear and trembling, love, that's all you'll get from me. Fear and bloody trembling.â⬠ââ¬Å"As long as we understand each other.â⬠ââ¬Å"So, it sounds as if you're thinking of conquering more than just the petting zoo?â⬠ââ¬Å"Europe,â⬠said the princess, as if stating the unadorned truth. ââ¬Å"Europe?â⬠said I. ââ¬Å"To start,â⬠said Cordelia. ââ¬Å"Well, then you had better get moving, hadn't you?â⬠ââ¬Å"Yes, I suppose,â⬠said Cordelia, with a great silly grin. ââ¬Å"Dear Pocket, would you help me pick an outfit?â⬠ââ¬Å"She's already taken Normandy, Brittany, and the Aquitaine,â⬠said Edgar, ââ¬Å"and Belgium soils itself at the mention of her name.â⬠ââ¬Å"Cordelia can be a bundle of rumpus when she sets her mind to something,â⬠said I. I smiled at the thought of her barking orders to the troops, all fury and fire from her lips, but those crystal-blue eyes hinting laughter at every turn. I missed her. ââ¬Å"Oh, I did betray her love and flay her sweet heart with stubborn pride,â⬠said Lear, looking madder and weaker than when I'd seen him last. ââ¬Å"Where is Kent?â⬠I asked Edgar, ignoring the old king. Drool and I had found them above a cliff at Dover. They all sat with their backs to a great chalk boulder: Gloucester, Edgar, and Lear. Gloucester snored softly, his head on Edgar's shoulder. We could see smoke from the French camp not two miles away in the distance. ââ¬Å"He's gone to Cordelia, to ask her to accept her father into her camp.â⬠ââ¬Å"Why didn't you go yourself?â⬠I asked Lear. ââ¬Å"I am afraid,â⬠said the old man. He hid his head under his arm, like a bird trying to escape the daylight beneath its wing. It was wrong. I wanted him strong, I wanted him stubborn, I wanted him full of arrogance and cruelty. I wanted to see those parts of him I knew were thriving when he'd thrown my mother on the stones so many years ago. I wanted to scream at him, humiliate him, hurt him in eleven places and watch him crawl in his own shit, dragging his bloody pride and guts behind him in the dirt. There was no revenge to be satisfied on this trembling shell of Lear. I wanted no part of it. ââ¬Å"I'm going to go nap behind those rocks,â⬠said I. ââ¬Å"Drool, keep watch. Wake me when Kent returns.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye, Pocket.â⬠The Natural went to the far side of Edgar's boulder, sat, and stared out over the sea. If we were attacked by a ship, he'd be Johnny-on-the-spot. I lay down and slept perhaps an hour before there was shouting behind me and I looked over my boulders to see Edgar holding his father's head, steadying him as the old man stood on a rock, perhaps a foot above the ground. ââ¬Å"Are we at the edge?â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye, there are fishermen on the beach below that look like mice. The dogs look like ants.â⬠ââ¬Å"What do the horses look like?â⬠asked Gloucester. ââ¬Å"There aren't any horses. Just fishermen and dogs. Don't you hear the sea crashing below?â⬠ââ¬Å"Yes. Yes, I do. Farewell, Edgar, my son. I am sorry. Gods, do your will!â⬠With that the old man leaped off the rock, expecting to plummet hundreds of feet to his death, I reckon, so he was somewhat surprised when he met the ground in an instant. ââ¬Å"Oh my lord! Oh my lord!â⬠said Edgar, trying to use a different voice and failing completely. ââ¬Å"Sir, you have duly fallen from the cliffs above.â⬠ââ¬Å"I have?â⬠said Gloucester. ââ¬Å"Aye, sir, can you not see?â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, no, you git, my eyes are bandaged and bloody. Can you not see?â⬠ââ¬Å"Sorry. What I saw was you fall from a great height and land as softly as if you were a feather floating down.â⬠ââ¬Å"I am dead, then,â⬠said Gloucester. He sank to his knees and seemed to lose his breath. ââ¬Å"I am dead, yet I still suffer, my grief is manifest, my eyes ache even though they are not there.â⬠ââ¬Å"That's because he's fucking with you,â⬠said I. ââ¬Å"What?â⬠said Gloucester. ââ¬Å"Shhhh,â⬠said Edgar. ââ¬Å"ââ¬ËTis a mad beggar, pay him no heed, good sir.â⬠ââ¬Å"Fine, you're dead. Enjoy,â⬠said I. I lay back on the ground, out of the wind, and pulled my coxcomb over my eyes. ââ¬Å"Come, come sit with me,â⬠said Lear. I sat up and watched Lear lead the blind man to his nest beneath the great boulders. ââ¬Å"Let the cruelties of the world slide off our bent backs, friend.â⬠Lear put his arm around Gloucester and held him while he spoke to the sky. ââ¬Å"My king,â⬠said Gloucester. ââ¬Å"I am safe in your mercy. My king.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye, king. But I have no soldiers, no lands, no subject quakes before me, no servants wait, and even your bastard son hath treated you better than my own daughters.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, for fuck's sake,â⬠said I. But I could see that the old blind man was smiling, and for all his suffering, he found comfort in his friend the king, no doubt having been blinded to his scoundrel nature long before Cornwall and Regan took his eyes. Blinded by loyalty. Blinded by title. Blinded by shoddy patriotism and false righteousness. He loved his mad, murdering king. I lay back down to listen. ââ¬Å"Let me kiss your hand,â⬠said Gloucester. ââ¬Å"Let me wipe it first,â⬠said Lear. ââ¬Å"It smells of mortality.â⬠ââ¬Å"I smell nothing, and see nothing evermore. I am not worthy.â⬠ââ¬Å"Art thou mad? See with your ears, Gloucester. Have you never seen a farmer's dog bark at a beggar, and thus chase him off? Is that dog the voice of authority? Is he better than the many for denying the man's hunger? Is a sheriff righteous who whips the whore, when it is for his own lust he punishes her? See, Gloucester. See who is worthy? Now we are stripped of finery, see. Small vices show through tattered clothes, when all is hidden beneath fur and fine robes. Plate sin with gold and the strong lance of justice breaks on decoration. Blessed are you, that you cannot see ââ¬â for you cannot see me for what I am: wretched.â⬠ââ¬Å"No,â⬠said Edgar. ââ¬Å"Your impertinence comes from madness. Do not weep, good king.â⬠ââ¬Å"Do not weep? We weep when we first smell the air. When we are born, we cry, that we come to this great stage of fools.â⬠ââ¬Å"No, all shall be well again, and ââ¬â ââ¬Å" And there was a thump, followed by another, and a yowl. ââ¬Å"Die, thou blind mole!â⬠came a familiar voice. I sat up in time to see Oswald standing over Gloucester, a bloodied stone in one hand, his sword driven down through the old earl's chest. ââ¬Å"You'll not poison my lady's cause further.â⬠He twisted the blade, and blood bubbled up out of the old man, but no sound did he make. He was quite dead. Oswald yanked his blade free and kicked Gloucester's body across Lear's lap, as the king cowered against the boulder. Edgar lay unconscious at Oswald's feet. The vermin drew back as if to drive his sword into Edgar's spine. ââ¬Å"Oswald!â⬠I shouted. I stood behind my boulders as I drew a throwing knife from the sheath at my back. The worm turned to me, and pulled his blade up. He dropped the bloody stone he'd used to brain Edgar. ââ¬Å"We have an arrangement,â⬠said I. ââ¬Å"And further slaughter of my cohorts will cause me to doubt your sincerity.â⬠ââ¬Å"Sod off, fool. We've no arrangement. You're a lying cur.â⬠ââ¬Å"Moi?â⬠said I, in perfect fucking French. ââ¬Å"I can give you your lady's heart, and not in the unpleasant, eviscerated, no-shagging-except-the-corpse way.â⬠ââ¬Å"You have no such power. You've not bewitched Regan's heart, neither. ââ¬ËTis she who sent me here to kill this blind traitor who turns minds against our forces. And to deliver this.â⬠He pulled a sealed letter from his jerkin. ââ¬Å"A letter of mark, giving you permission in the name of the Duchess of Cornwall to be a total twatgoblin?â⬠ââ¬Å"Your wit is dull, fool. It is a love letter to Edmund of Gloucester. He set out for here with a scouting party to assess the French forces.â⬠ââ¬Å"My wit is dull? My wit is dull?â⬠ââ¬Å"Yes. Dull,â⬠said Oswald. ââ¬Å"Now, en garde,â⬠said he in barely passable fucking French. ââ¬Å"Yes,â⬠said I, with an exaggerated nod. ââ¬Å"Yes.â⬠And with that, Oswald found himself seized by the throat and dashed several times against the boulders, which relieved him of his sword, his dagger, the love letter, and his coin purse. Drool then held the steward up and squeezed his throat, slowly but sternly, causing wet gurgling noises to bubble from his foul gullet. I said, ââ¬Å"While unscathed by my rapier wit You're choked to death by a giant git By this gentle jester, is argument won I'll leave you two to have your fun.â⬠Oswald seemed somewhat surprised by the turn of events, so much so, that both his eyes and tongue protruded from his face in a wholly unhealthy way. He then began to surrender his various fluids and Drool had to hold him away to keep from being fouled by them. ââ¬Å"Drop him,â⬠said Lear, who still cowered by the boulders. Drool looked to me and I shook my head, ever so slightly. ââ¬Å"Die, thou badger-shagging spunk monkey,â⬠said I. When Oswald stopped kicking and simply hung limp and dripping, I nodded to my apprentice, who tossed the steward's body over the cliff as easily as if it were an apple core. Drool went down on one knee over Gloucester's body. ââ¬Å"I were going to teach him to be a fool.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye, lad, I know you were.â⬠I stood by my boulders, resisting the urge to comfort the great murderous git with a pat on the shoulder. There was a rustling from over the top of the hill and I thought I heard the sound of metal on metal through the wind. ââ¬Å"Now he's blind and dead,â⬠said the Natural. ââ¬Å"Bugger,â⬠said I, under my breath. Then to Drool, ââ¬Å"Hide, and don't fight, and don't call for me.â⬠I fell flat to the ground as the first soldier topped the hill. Bugger! Bugger! Bugger! Bloody bollocksing buggering bugger! I reflected serenely. Then I heard the voice of the bastard Edmund. ââ¬Å"Look, my fool. And what's this? The king? What good fortune! You'll make a fine hostage to stay the hand of the Queen of France and her forces.â⬠ââ¬Å"Have you no heart?â⬠said Lear, petting the head of his dead friend Gloucester. I peeked out between my rocks. Edmund was looking at his dead father with the expression of someone who has just encountered rat scat in his toast for tea. ââ¬Å"Yes, well, tragic I suppose, but with succession of his title determined and his sight gone, a timely exit was only polite. Who's this other deader?â⬠Edmund kicked his unconscious half brother in the shoulder. ââ¬Å"A beggar,â⬠said Drool. ââ¬Å"He were trying to protect the old man.â⬠ââ¬Å"This is not the sword of a beggar. Neither is this purse.â⬠Edmund picked up Oswald's purse. ââ¬Å"These belong to Goneril's man, Oswald.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye, milord,â⬠said Drool. ââ¬Å"Well, where is he?â⬠ââ¬Å"On the beach.â⬠ââ¬Å"On the beach? He climbed down and left his purse and sword here?â⬠ââ¬Å"He was a tosser,â⬠said Drool. ââ¬Å"So I tossed him over. He kilt your old da.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, quite right. Well done, then.â⬠Edmund threw the purse to Drool. ââ¬Å"Use it to bribe your jailer for a bread crust. Take them.â⬠The bastard motioned for his men to seize Drool and Lear. When the old man had trouble standing, Drool lifted him to his feet and steadied him. ââ¬Å"What about the bodies?â⬠asked Edmund's captain. ââ¬Å"Let the French bury them. Quickly, to the White Tower. I've seen enough.â⬠Lear coughed then, a dry, feeble cough like the creaking of Death's door hinges, until I thought he might collapse into a pile of blue. One of Edmund's men gave the old man a sip of water, which seemed to quell the coughing, but he couldn't stand or support his weight. Drool hoisted him up on one shoulder and carried him up the hill ââ¬â the old man's bony bottom bouncing on the great git's shoulder as if it was the cushion of a sedan chair. When they were gone I scrambled out of my hiding place and over to Edgar's prostrate body. The wound on his scalp wasn't deep, but it had bled copiously, as scalp wounds are wont to do. The resulting puddle of gore had probably saved Edgar's life. I got him propped against the boulder and brought him around with some gentle smacking and a stout splashing from his water skin. ââ¬Å"What?â⬠Edgar looked around, and shook his head to clear his vision, a motion he clearly regretted immediately. Then he spotted his father's corpse and wailed. ââ¬Å"I'm sorry, Edgar,â⬠said I. ââ¬Å"ââ¬ËTwas Goneril's steward, Oswald, knocked you out and killed him. Drool strangled the scurvy dog and tossed him over the cliff.â⬠ââ¬Å"Where is Drool? And the king?â⬠ââ¬Å"Taken, by your bastard brother's men. Listen, Edgar, I need to follow them. You go to the French camp. Take them a message.â⬠Edgar's eyes rolled and I thought he might pass out again, so I threw some more water in his face. ââ¬Å"Look at me. Edgar, you must go to the French camp. Tell Cordelia that she should attack the White Tower directly. Tell her to send ships up the Thames and bring a force through London over land as well. Kent will know the plan. Have her sound the trumpet three times before they attack the keep. Do you understand?â⬠ââ¬Å"Three times, the White Tower?â⬠I tore the back off of the dead earl's shirt, wadded it up, and gave it to Edgar. ââ¬Å"Here, hold this on your noggin to staunch the blood.â⬠ââ¬Å"And tell Cordelia not to hold for fear for her father's life. I'll see to it that it's not an issue.â⬠ââ¬Å"Aye,â⬠said Edgar. ââ¬Å"She'll not save the king by holding the attack.ââ¬
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